Chapter Text
7:48 pm
Double prophecy child changed their name to water boy
water boy: anyways, did my eyes deceive me or did Octavian just tumble head over heel on that tiny ass hill?
The Queen: how’d you arrive there already??
water boy: mysterious circ*mstances
The Queen: What?
Richest Horse Girl: Percy found a perfectly working abandoned car and uh…. Stole it?
water boy: hazel why :(
Richest Horse Girl: sorry Perce but it had to be done
The Queen: You did WHAT???
Material girl: bro just broke another law lmao
Phone charger: “another”
water boy: so? I was involved in a nationwide manhunt at the age of twelve :/
water boy: this means nothing
Phone charger: Are you sure about that?
water boy: says the guy who’s been missing since the age of two
Phone charger: Am I really still missing? Why was that not changed?
Material girl: add it to the list
Material girl: anyways
Material girl added Rachel Elizabeth Dare to the group chat
Material girl changed Rachel Elizabeth Dare’s name to Witch
Witch: *gasp* a group chat???
The Queen: Hello Rachel!!!
Witch: glad to see I’ve FINALLY been added
water boy: dam it piper
water boy: why must you let Rachel win?
Material girl: cause I’m an independent woman and I make my own choices
Bad Boy McShizzle: Rachel bribed her with those chips that beauty queen really likes I think
Material girl: ….
Bad Boy McShizzle: I smell danger
Ghost king: hide
~~~
8:21 pm
Bad Boy McShizzle: I HJTE YIU
Witch: you hit me? That’s very 1950’s toxic husband of you Leo
Bad Boy McShizzle: NO I MEANT I HATE YOU
Witch: is it because I’m a woman?
Material girl: that’s not very feminist of you Leo
Bad Boy McShizzle: that’s it, I’m no longer a feminist
Furry: What did Rachel do to you?
Witch: I got him in trouble with Chiron so now he has to clean the stables tomorrow 😁
Bad Boy McShizzle: 😒
~~~
10:35 am
Ghost king added William Solace to the group chat
Ghost king renamed William Solace to Sunshine
Ghost king: he wouldn’t leave me alone about it :/
Sunshine: aww you love me anyways
Ghost king: …
Material girl: ooooh I sense something
Ghost king: shut it
Witch: hmmm we’re adding friends, I see
Witch added Reyna Avila Ramírez-Arellano to the group chat
Witch renamed Reyna Avila Ramírez-Arellano to RARA
RARA: I knew you guys would never give this up
Valid immortal: oh hey gays
Valid immortal: my bad, I meant guys
Material girl: 🤭
Ghost king: okay that’s enough of that
water boy: guys I was sent a video (Jason) and I heard MR. D say “sometimes I’m asked… if I had a gun…” in the background and that’s all I heard but um…..
The Queen: I think he was talking about science??
water boy: Mr. D??? And SCIENCE?? You do know that he almost incinerated me the first time we met because I mentioned science???
Witch: WELL
Witch: wait, literally how did you just spell “incinerated” and “mentioned” and “science” correct???
Witch: now that I think about it, how did ANY of you spell ANYTHING correctly here?
Bad Boy McShizzle: I’m just that good
Richest Horse Girl: Magic!!!!
RARA: interesting
~~~
5:44 pm
Bad Boy McShizzle: what does it mean if you’re entire body feels bruised and you feel weirdly cold and your head hurts a lot
Phone charger: it means you should go visit the infirmary
Sunshine: sounds like a fever. You better come here leo
Material girl: see Leo, this is why you need to sleep, eat, and occasionally leave bunker 9 and the forge
Bad Boy McShizzle: but piperrrrr
The Queen: Leo, go to the infirmary.
Bad Boy McShizzle: yes ma’am
~~~
3:00 pm
water boy: Frank and Hazel are in a meeting
water boy: I’m bored
Sunshine: socialize
water boy: but people
Ghost king: mood
The Queen: you are literally in New Rome, how are you bored?
water boy: idk I kinda already went through the entire city lol
water boy: I met this guy named Fillip tho.
water boy: he specifically said it was spelled with an F
water boy: cool guy, he’s a Demeter kid
water boy: er, Ceres? Whatever. Anyways he’s busy and I’m bored
Phone charger: oh yeah I know him
Phone charger: don’t let him tell you a joke though, he’s absolutely terrible at them and most of them sound vaguely sexist
water boy: too late :/
water boy: it was kinda funny tho, like stupid enough to be funny
Bad Boy McShizzle: guys Wikipedia blocked me :(
Ghost king: I would too if I was Wikipedia
Sunshine: what are you even using Wikipedia for??? I thought you were like super smart or something
Richest Horse Girl: “or something”
Material girl: dksvjsvsjdbs LMAO HAZEL
Bad Boy McShizzle: betrayed by hazel :(
water boy: it’s ok Leo, you’ll live
Bad Boy McShizzle: everyone just doesn’t appreciate my charm ✋😔
Material girl: ok…
Bad Boy McShizzle: 😒
~~~
5:31 pm
Furry: wait Hazel, we’re you texting during the meeting?
Valid immortal: 👀
Richest Horse Girl: I’m sorry Frank but it was a good opportunity and I had to take it!
Furry: fine but please don’t make it a habit. Love you ❤️
Richest Horse Girl: I won’t! ❤️❤️
lord of the wild: wow it’s like as sweet as Percy and Annabeth but even sweeter
lord of the wild: I think I might have cavities
RARA: so true
~~~
8:02 pm
water boy: tell me why I just passed by an eight year old girl on my way to Chick-fil-A and I heard the words “sexual harassment” come out of her phone????
Furry: Uh what
Valid immortal: interesting
Witch: kids these days 😔
Valid immortal: fr i don’t even know what things they could possibly be watching
lord of the wild: sorry I’m a bit out of the loop but why is Percy going to Chick-fil-A?
water boy: cause I want to
Furry: What? When’d you find a way to leave New Rome without me knowing??
water boy: inside information 😏
Phone charger: sorry it was me. I told him how to leave because he was apparently going to die of boredom
water boy: I was about to start a food war for fun
Furry: I didn’t know New Rome was going to be so boring for you, I could start a game of capture the flag? (please don’t start a food war)
water boy: YES PLEASE.
water boy: Also it wasn’t super boring really but then you guys were in a meeting and I missed Annabeth too 💔
The Queen: It’s ok Seaweed brain, I’ll either travel to New Rome or you’ll come to CHB soon 💙
~~~
7:58 pm
Bad Boy McShizzle: I have had the weirdest realization that I remember absolutely NOTHING from last week. Like I’m almost fully convinced I was only half conscious the entire time and the entirety of last week was just a insomnia induced fever dream.
Material girl: LEO GO TO THE FRICKING INFIRMARY OR GODS HELP YOU I WILL DRAG YOU KICKING AND SCREAMING OUT OF BUNKER 9
Bad Boy McShizzle: Piper………
Material girl: I have so many people on board that WILL bodily drag you out of there. Plus I’ll call Will over too
Bad Boy McShizzle: ok fine but mostly for the sake of not being chewed out by the resident doctor
Sunshine: too late
~~~
